Airline “security” hits a new low.
In case yesterday’s post didn’t give it away, I took a little trip this past weekend. The fact that I flew ANA (All Nippon Airways), should tell you where I went. (The answer is “Japan” if you still haven’t caught on.)
These days, flying seems to mean one thing – security. And not just security, but security take to absurd lengths. Grandmas being cavity searched, luggage violated and ruined by minimum wage goons, and lots of dumb new policies. I didn’t run into any of these during my January trip to Tokyo, but I sure caught one this time.
As I’m going through security at Gimpo (Seoul), my bags go through the x-ray machine, as per usual. When they come out the other side, the guy wants me to open it up. No problem, certainly nothing wrong with that. I already know what’s tripped up the x-ray. This:
I guess batteries look weird due to their density, chemical makeup or some such thing. I had the same thing happen with the rechargeables for my digital camera back in January. So I pull the pack out and show the guy, expecting everything to be cool.
No, everything is not cool.He tells me I can’t have them in my carry-on bag.
Excuse me?
They’re fucking batteries, dude! And they’re still in the original package. Exactly what sort of a threat are they presenting here?
He can’t explain, continually insisting that I can’t take them on board, but I can go back downstair and check them through. Yeah, like I’m going to dick around checking a $4 pack of batteries, doing all the paperwork that entails, then wait for them on the other end.
Don’t fucking think so.
Enjoy your free batteries, asshole.
I get huffy, tell him to keep them and close my bag up. He asks for my boarding pass and wanders away for a minute. I can only imagine that I’m entered into some “potential troublemaker” database and that my seat on the plane is being fitted with supplemental restraints. Swell.
I abandon the Duracells and head off to immigration and to wait at the gate. No further snafus and I’m off to Japan.
Here’s what I don’t get. When were batteries in their original package declared a “safety issue?” I mean, when I flew two months ago I had four loose batteries in a fucking ziploc bag, and they didn’t bat an eye. And there were four identical batteries in my camera too. And two more in my CD player. Two months ago, that was cool as can be. Now, I’m a threat? Is it the quantity that’s a problem? Four is cool, but thirteen isn’t?
Shit, what about the funky lithium-polymer battery in my iPod? I’m surprised they didn’t try to tell me I could bring the iPod, but would have to leave the battery behind.
And it seems that this policy is not a universal thing. When I went back through security at Haneda (Tokyo) yesterday, there were no issues. Granted, I didn’t have the pack of batteries in my bag, but would you like to guess what you can buy –
IN THE FUCKING AIRPORT – once you’ve passed security?
If you guessed “batteries” you’re a winner!Two separate places selling them, and in a variety of shapes, sizes, voltages and chemical makeups. So is this just paranoia on Korea’s part?Who knows. What I do know, is that I won’t be packing any fucking batteries next time.
Assholes.
Footnote of interest. On landing and takeoff, ANA has a camera mounted on the underside of the plane that they turn on and display on the in-cabin screens. It was only used at Haneda though, and not for the takeoff or landing at Gimpo. There was also an announcement prior to landing at Gimpo saying that photography of the airport was forbidden, both from the air and inside the airport.
What the fuck’s that about?!?
That airport’s been there for decades. Like it’s fucking Area 51 or some shit all of the sudden?I’ll say it again:
Assholes.